It’s been a busy couple of weeks–running to hardware stores for items we need, remembering one more thing to order on Amazon, and generally getting ready to go on our first trip. It’s so exciting that we are *almost* there!
A few notes from the last couple weeks…
First, I’m really impressed with how much fun I’m having learning about things like electrical systems, and how to change a battery. I’m actually glad that a few things needed work right now, because it’s giving me the chance to work on them with my dad and learn from him. I was never a mechanically minded person, but I’m catching on and enjoying the process. Years ago, I even would have said that I *couldn’t* learn this stuff and that I just wasn’t cut out for it. I’m not sure if it’s maturity or just latent, innate skill, but I know now that I was so wrong! It’s even transferable knowledge! At work, a spring had broken on the cash register. And I fixed it–with a paper clip!
I also heard a song that had a line that really spoke to me: “Don’t be fooled by your emptiness”. I thought about how many people are unhappy with their circumstances, and how they feel powerless to change anything. The stark reality is that the only thing you *have to do* is breathe. Why? Because even if you hold your breath until you pass out, you will then automatically start breathing again. Literally everything else in our lives is a choice. But, so many entities have a stake in making you believe that you need them to attain happiness. Heck, all modern advertising is based on the premise that you lack something, and a company can provide a product or service to fill that void.
The line also made me think about the idea that when you’re really feeling down about yourself, you should first check whether you are surrounded by asshats. When you’re working a job that’s not right for you, or in a relationship with someone who treats you terribly, you start to see yourself in a negative light. Don’t be fooled! That is just your intuition’s way of telling you that things are not as they should be for you and that it’s time for a change.
Mostly, it reminded me that I have great control over my life and experiences, and that I should not believe that feeling lousy is the automatic default. There’s really no reason that happiness can’t be our default mode. I’m working very hard to set it as my standard.
Finally, I’m starting to conscientiously avoid newspapers. We don’t have TV, so I never get my news that way, but I always enjoyed reading the paper. But, I’ve noticed that I feel tight in the chest as I read it. I get angry at injustices and upset for victims. And those are not the sorts of emotions I want to cultivate! I suspect that all this knowledge is not for the best; we are some of the first people in history to have the ability to know about all the world’s miseries as they happen, and frankly, I think it’s damaging for our psyches. I’m feeling better to be a bit out of the loop!
Now then, I’m on to my favorite pre-trip job of listmaking. I’m very excited to go off on an adventure next week and start making my dream into reality!